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Friday 19 March 2010

Spoiler: Whining ahead.


Did you know there are sites out there explaining how to hold intelligent conversations? (( And I quote: "This has less to do with their intelligence quotient (IQ) than with their emotional quotient (EQ). Only a self-aware, self-confident person with excellent social skills has the ability to engage in intelligent conversation."
Unquote))
Or another really brilliant one: How to be interesting to other people.
How do I know?

Because I've been having too much time to think, I've been analyzing every single thing I say and do. Everything I let happen and everything I let others say to me.
And though always swamped in self-doubt, insecurities and always being "too harsh on myself", this is even worse.
I wonder what I have in that hole where everybody else has at least /some/ ego, and a bit of self-confidence.
I cannot be interesting anymore, I bore everyone I talk to. I don't hold intelligent conversations because I'm either incapable of holding them, or incapable of letting others know I'm capable of holding them.

Even more horrible?
Typing this is just making it worse.
It's like admitting you have three feet, five heads and a total of three fingers.
And no, this does not make me any more interesting. Just more whiny.
Yay to me.

I'm thinking I need a shuffle, a desert, and some energy drinks to keep digging even if my body wants to shut down.
I don't want to nag. Or be whiny. Or be this.
I don't want to be me anymore..

The Gypsy.

1 comment:

  1. I'm not bored at all ,despite the lack of chat.

    Your words are funny here because you really are
    interesting and capable of so much.

    Have you ever wondered why we humanoids have
    one head ,two arms and two legs?

    Why do we have 5 fingers on each hand?

    Think about it ,magical number 5...

    ...our universe seemingly is a dodecahedron
    meaning its gotten 5 corners on each of its
    10 sides. 10 fingers ,10 sides..?

    What I mean to say is there's a reason for it.

    Lack of self-confidence will pass sooner or later~

    I don't care what anyone says ,you are special.

    ReplyDelete